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Category: Humor

Top 14 Reasons Preschool Boys are Like Drunk Old Men

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns 11 Comments

When my daughter (now nine) was around four or five years old, every once in a while she would enter a special kind of state of mind that we fondly referred to as “drunk college roommate.”

99% of the time “drunk college roommate” showed up at bedtime, primarily when it was time to put pajamas on. It would start innocently enough with her telling a little silly joke and then proceeding to laugh so hard that she could fall down, in various stages of pajama undress. Then she would attempt to stand up and steady herself and get all serious, stare deep into my eyes and while patting down both sides of my hair with her tiny hands say things like, “Momma…you’re sooooo pretty.” (All of this, of course, with only one leg of her pajamas on.)
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Our Bathroom Remodel - Episode 5: Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

Our Bathroom Remodel – Episode 5: Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns Leave a comment

FEBRUARY 23 – “TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK”

Okay, so I’m a week behind in my updates. I was going to be sneaky and try to back date my entries and pretend I was all up to speed, but I’ve had 2 glasses of wine and have a book club book to finish so I’m doing the speed-round version of updates instead.

So, the #1 lesson I want you to take away from our week in remodeling is “it doesn’t hurt to ask.”

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The Oscars – The Dusty Parachute Takes on The Academy Awards

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns 2 Comments

My husband and I love movies.  I mean we reallllly love movies.

The first show my daughter was ever allowed to watch on TV was the Oscars.  When most people were busy potty training their kids we were packing extra diapers so we could ‘movie-theater-train’ our kids.

We live next to the most amazing movie theater in the world, The Alamo Drafthouse, where not only can you eat and drink while you watch your movie, your tickets are for reserved seats (like at a play!), and we know the best seats in every one of their theaters.  (Not telling you because then you’ll go take them.)
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I’ve Got So Much Compassion It’s Coming Out of My Compassion

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns 8 Comments

A post about compassion for The #1000 Speak Campaign? Easy Peasy! I’m so full of compassion that I’ve got compassion coming out of my compassion.

I totally care about the suffering of others….and not even just when their suffering causes my suffering.

Like how I’m so full of compassion about the challenges of being a fourth grader that I don’t come right out and tell my daughter that she’s the reason that mommy starts eyeing the wine bottle from across the room during homework time.
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Our Bathroom Remodel - Episode 2 - The Toxic Shower Pan

Our Bathroom Remodel – Episode 2: The Toxic Shower Pan

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns Leave a comment

FEBRUARY 8 & 9 – JUST A *LITTLE BIT* OF BRAIN DAMAGE

Well, things look pretty much the same in the bathroom this weekend, but boy do they smell different!

Saturday morning a nice man came bright and early to supposedly line the new shower pan with fiberglass. What it smells like he did was just fill the room with 20 gallons of 1970’s nail polish remover….remember the good stuff before there were FDA regulations on that kind of thing?

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Our Bathroom Remodel - Episode 1 - It Begins!

Our Bathroom Remodel – Episode 1 – It Begins!

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns Leave a comment

FEBRUARY 6, 2015 – IT BEGINS!!!

It’s an exciting week in our house – after 3.5 months of selecting contractors, flooring, granite, cabinet-makers and paint colors, demolition has finally started for our master bathroom remodel.

For those of you who enjoy remodels (especially when they’re not yours), I’ll be documenting the process along the way. Think of it as “This Old House”, except instead taking you through the remodel of a charming 400 year old home in New England, I’m taking you through the repair of a leaky bathroom in a mid-90’s mass-produced planned-community home in Austin, TX.

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Have You Hugged a Curly Haired Girl Today?

The Dusty Parachute by Susanne Kerns 16 Comments

Oh Dove, you’ve gone and done it again. Your creative team has whipped up another heart-warming, tear-jerking commercial to help make all of us ladies feel beautiful (or at least feel guilty about not feeling beautiful.)

In case you haven’t seen it, here’s the recap: The ad starts with a collection of adorable little girls with curly hair discussing how much they dislike having curly hair. We then move into a musical montage of gorgeous, curly haired moms accompanied by their curly-haired daughters, spinning in the streets to a catchy tune. The grand finale is the little girls walking into a room for a surprising ‘eyes covered’ reveal where their mom are dancing to a curly haired band playing a song repeating the lyrics, “We all love our curls, we all love our hair…Oh I love it, love it!”
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